Unmasking: Not just for Halloween
The Cost of Pretending, “High-Functioning” Lies, and What It Means to Be Seen
“You seem fine.”
How many times have you heard that—right before spiraling on the inside?
If October is about masks, let’s talk about the ones we wear all year:
The “I’m fine” smile at work.
The “I’ve got it handled” text, even when you don’t.
The queer person blending in to stay safe.
The neurodivergent adult mimicking social cues.
The high-achieving student collapsing after class.
This blog is about those masks. The glittery ones. The high-functioning ones. The exhausting, heavy, trauma-trained ones.
✨ The Glittery Mask Is Still Heavy
Masking isn’t always about pretending to be someone else. Sometimes it’s what we learned to do to survive.
You were praised for being “so mature” when really, you just had no choice.
You got labeled “strong” because your breakdowns happened in private.
You became the reliable one, the peacekeeper, the achiever—because that’s what got you safety, belonging, or love.
But at what cost?
Behind the glittery, functional, organized version of you...
…is a tired human who doesn’t want to explain why they’re struggling when everything “looks fine.”
👻 “High-Functioning” Is a Myth
The phrase “high-functioning” gets thrown around a lot, but as we approach Mental Illness Awareness Week can we finally admit - It’s trash.
High-functioning just means “suffering invisibly.”
It erases how hard you’re working to look okay.
It suggests you’re only worthy of support when you stop functioning.
Spoiler alert:
You don’t need to fall apart in public to deserve care.
You don’t need to wait until you're in crisis to unmask.
You don’t need to keep playing “strong” just because people expect you to.
🌈 Unmasking Is a Form of Liberation (and Also? Terrifying.)
In LGBTQ+ History Month, we remember people who didn’t just “come out”—they came forward, despite systems that told them to stay small, invisible, digestible.
That’s what unmasking can feel like too:
Showing up in your softness, not just your smarts.
Naming your needs without apology.
Letting someone see your messy without rushing to clean it up.
Coming forward in your full identity
And yeah—there’s grief in taking the mask off. Sometimes we miss who we had to be and the illusion of safety that may have been there. But there’s also freedom in choosing to be seen on your terms.
💌 Share This With Someone Tired of Being the Strong One
You know who I mean:
The one who cancels their own needs to show up for everyone else
The one people go to for advice but never ask how they’re doing
The one you secretly admire and worry about at the same time
📬 Forward this to them. Or read it together. T
It’s okay to unmask, even if it’s one glittery eyelash at a time.
🎭 TL;DR
Masking may have kept you safe, but it’s okay to outgrow it
“High-functioning” is a myth and a trap
Unmasking in therapy is about choosing truth over performance—and we’re here for it
Whether you take off your mask slowly or all at once, you’re allowed to be seen.
You don’t have to carry it alone. Not here.
—
Whole Mentality
Therapy for humans who are tired of pretending.