Haunted by the Hustle: Why Rest Feels Scary When You’re Used to Surviving
Rest isn’t laziness. It’s nervous system repair. It’s justice. It’s scary. And it’s necessary.
👻 The scariest part of spooky season? Slowing down.
Let’s be honest: ghosts aren’t the only thing haunting us this time of year…there’s also an election upon us! [I wish I was kidding, but I’m not about to traumatize you with this blog.]
Sometimes the most terrifying thing isn’t a haunted house, it’s resting.
Like… actually resting. Logging off. Saying no. Letting your phone die. Doing nothing and not immediately spiraling about it.
Because when you’ve spent your life surviving—especially as a queer, neurodivergent, trauma-impacted person, or semi-functioning human living in a capitalist society —rest can feel unsafe. Unfamiliar. Even unbearable.
And not because you’re doing anything wrong.
Because your nervous system learned that moving = surviving.
🌀 Hustle is a Trauma Response (and a Capitalist Scam)
Let’s call it what it is: many of us are out here overfunctioning like it’s a full-time job. Because... it kind of is.
The pressure to:
Stay “productive”
Be available 24/7
Prove your worth through work
Be the strong one, the resilient one, the helper
…it all piles up, especially if you were never allowed to fall apart. Especially if you’ve had to:
Fight for your own safety
Care for others before yourself
Code-switch, mask, or overperform just to get through the day
The world has rewarded you for your hustle. And punished you for your stillness.
So now, when things are calm, your brain whispers:
“Something must be wrong.”
🛑 Rest Feels Like Stopping Mid-Sprint—And It Kinda Is
Here’s what your nervous system might say when you try to rest:
“You're falling behind.”
“You’re lazy.”
“People will stop loving you if you're not useful.”
“It’s selfish to slow down when others need you.”
Sound familiar?
You’re not imagining that discomfort. Rest can feel threatening when all your systems are screaming “survival mode.”
That’s not dysfunction. That’s adaptation.
You were trained to hustle. You were never taught how to rest.
But just because it’s unfamiliar doesn’t mean it’s unsafe.
🧠 Mental Illness, Overfunctioning, & Spooky Season Triggers
Mental Illness Awareness Week lands right at the start of October — and while much of the convo focuses on symptoms and diagnoses, let’s talk about one that flies under the radar:
Overfunctioning as a trauma-informed coping strategy.
Some of us don’t “break down” in ways people expect.
We stay busy. Hyper-organized. Relentlessly helpful. Always in motion.
It’s not always seen as a problem, but it is exhausting.
And often? It's a way to avoid grief, fear, rage, or loneliness — feelings that need stillness to surface.
This October, we’re not asking you to “do less.” We’re inviting you to ask: what’s driving the need to do more?
🕯️ Rest as Resistance. Rest as Ritual. Rest as Rebellion.
For queer folks, BIPOC folks, disabled folks—rest isn’t indulgent. It’s reparative.
It’s a refusal to conform to systems that require your burnout to keep functioning.
Let’s redefine what rest looks like:
Rage naps
Logging off without an autoresponder
Crying in the car and calling it a sacred ritual
Watching 2007 YouTube videos under a weighted blanket
Setting boundaries without overexplaining
It doesn’t have to be “healing” to be valid.
It doesn’t have to be aesthetic to be effective.
It doesn’t have to be productive at all.
🛌 What Haunts Your Rest?
Take a second and ask yourself:
What story do I tell myself when I rest?
Whose voice is it that calls me lazy, unmotivated, or selfish?
What would I need in place to feel safer slowing down?
Sometimes the ghosts we’re running from aren’t spiritual — they’re internalized.
And the real haunting? The guilt we carry when we choose ourselves.
💌 Share Your Soft Resistance Rituals
This month, we’re reclaiming rest. In the messy, imperfect, human way.
Blanket cocoons
Rage naps
Journal scribbles that don’t make sense
Stretching in sweatpants
Saying “no” without a reason
Let’s normalize rest that doesn’t require an excuse.
Let’s let stillness be sacred—even when it feels scary.
🧠 TL;DR
If rest feels scary, it’s not because you’re broken. It’s because your nervous system is brilliant.
Overfunctioning is a survival strategy, not a personality trait.
Rest is not laziness. It’s liberation.
You don’t have to earn your rest. You already deserve it.
This spooky season, we’re unlearning the hustle and haunting the systems that taught us otherwise.
You’re allowed to slow down.
You’re allowed to do less.
You’re allowed to just be.
—
Whole Mentality
Therapy that honors your survival — and helps you create something softer.